我的心事谁能知?

Love cannot be forced. It will only lead to hatred.

Somehow I believe in this.

"What is yours definitely will be yours someday. What is not yours, it will never be no matter how hard you tried."

I feel like writing a whole big chunk of words,

but i don't know what to write ohhhhhhh~

And i know my post is boooringgggg.

Filled with sadness. x_x

Sorry guys.

Anyway, Starrrrr is heading to bed now!

I'm super dupie exhausted.

Eyes shutting soon. ~.~

Had not been sleeping well for the past few days...

{Fuck}=(is the word) the ulcers in my mouth x_x

So soooo so, Good night!

Whenever i think about you, i'll look at our peektures that we took tgt.

I miss you alot oh. Do you know that?

Sigh.. Wondering when will i have the chance to see you again...

I'm feeling terrible manzxzxz.

I cried when i woke up this morning. For no particular reason.

Emotional breakdown? :\

Its nice to smile when I get your phone call at night
But I'd rather have you here with me, right next to me
I miss the way you hold me tight..

Well. Work was pretty fine today.
And guess what, i reached punctually! Infact, i'm the first to reach.
It's been raining for the past few days! Seriously, dampen my mood to the maximum.

Finally i can get a good long beauty sleep tonight. I'm feeling real tired. Slept less than 6 hours almost everyday.
Perhaps i'm feeling too stress that it causes me sleepless nights.

I'm real glad to see your goodnight text although i knew it meant nothing.
But i feel as though my heart stop pumping for a second that kinda feeling. You know? :/
I really do miss you.. so so much.. that iiii.......

Goodbye guys. I'm currently not in the mood to blog now. Sigh.




P.S : Up till now, you're still the only one.
This love is killing me gently.

Y HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY DEAREST DER!

I hope you enjoy your birthday celebration yesterday as well as today eh! :D
And most importantly, stay happy Tan Khor Nee!
No matter what, i'll always be there for you whenever you need me. Okay? I promise! (:
Well, I've known you for more than 7 years and it's still counting!
We'll stay as one forever! ♥
Star lovessss you alot!! ^^

If you loved me as much as you said you did

Then you wouldn’t have hurt me like I ain’t shit

Now you pushed me away like you never even knew me

I loved you with my heart, really and truly

There's nothing much to update lately..
Finally there's peektures in this post eh?!

P.S : Is there really a need to avoid me?!

Perhaps i'm just being paranoid.
Am I suffering from Depression? Hmmm..
I get moodswings most of the time. Happy, sad, happy, sad.
I'm really really tired of living..

I cry for the memories I've left behind

I cry for the pain, the lost,

I cry for the times I thought I had you..

Rak Chan Riak Wa Thoe

Tell me how can I tell you, That I love you more than life?

If only you can feel what I'm feeling.
If only you know what exactly I'm thinking about.

If only you know my pain.

If only you see my tears.
If only you hear me blubbering.
If only you know my changes.
Everyday I'm struggling hard to be free..

我笑中还有泪

It's raining cats and dogs now = Staying at home. ~.~

It was real happy to see you taking the initiative to speak to me in msn.
I was shocked that it makes me in total lost of words. Hardly know what I should replied.
The feeling it's like i'm gonna cry again..

Alright, i shall not spread my emo-ness in this post anymore..

Sighhhhhh, Bye!

As good as dead

Hmmm, work was fine. Seriously, I'm tired. Although i need to stand for long hours while working, but i don't mind actually. At least it's better to keep myself occupied with stuffs rather than to stay home and start imaginating things.

Sigh, I really don't know what had went wrong with me. I'm no longer "Star" that i used to know myself. My life seems so meaningless. Feels like as though I'm living just for the sake of living.

You kept appearing in my mind, it just won't fade away.

I'm always wondering "How are you doing?", "Are you doing fine?", "Have you eaten your lunch/dinner?" No longer receiving your texts now. No longer receiving your calls like how you used to ring me up every morning for school when i'm still in College East(Which is last year, I Remember every single thing). I'm afraid to text you. Everything had changed. I just miss you so much.

I FEEL LIKE AN EMO SHIET RIGHT NOW. Good night.

All I see is pain and misery

Apparently, woke up for work and i'm almost late if i din't took a cab. Reached just in time!
Since the day i started working, i'd been late almost everyday. I can't figured out the reasons why. Perhaps i'm still not used to waking up for work early in the morning. Because i used to stay up very late when i'm not working so yeah..
BUT, i will change this habit of mine in order not to lose the job.


Anyway, Thanks for the Sharkfin & Bubbletea again (:
Passed to me and headed elsewhere.


Met up with Han wen after work to chill over at The Coffeebean because he couldn't thought of any places to go. I wanted to go home after work actually. But because of the sentence he said "I buey steady.", i decided to meet him up. Darn evil. But nevermind, i shall forgive you. :X
He kept making me laugh. Saying he darn handsome. Tsk..
After slacking, fetched me home...



Sigh, today ain't my day!
I'm not happy. I'm not happy. I'm not happy.

Saturday, 9th August 2008

Thanks for the food and bubble tea (:
Came all the way to my work place just to pass it to me and went off.
Anyway, i shall named the person "Anonymous" because i guess i shouldn't revealed his identity.

Caught the movie "Money not enough 2" with Kapang and friends at Bedok. The movie was effing touching and some parts were funny and lame. The touching part that i could recalled was the granny sacrificed her life just to save her son-in-laws' child..
Rated : 4/5 ^^
After movie, slack awhile and went back home. (:

Sunday, 10th August 2008

Went ecp with friends to see them play Billiard. ~.~
I'm like so boring over there lah. Doink!
I wanted to sit on the rock, enjoying the breeze of the sea..
I FUCKING WANNA THROW ALL MY EMO-NESS INTO THE SEA.
My heart feels as though it weighs a ton.
I hate the feeling of being an emo faggot!

----

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over
I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

This song makes me fill with tears.

The entire song suits the feeling of what i'm feeling now totally..

我在向前走却像在退后
我在用想念狂欢寂寞
越快乐就越失落
爱将我们高高举起以后
再让心学会坠落
怀念这宽阔的天空
虽然那里空气很稀薄

我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起

一个人不懂什么是拥有
两个人不懂怎么把握
越在乎就越脆弱
爱将我们高高举起以后
再让心学会坠落
怀念这宽阔的天空
虽然那里空气很稀薄

我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起

我努力想起你笑着哭泣
让自己深爱你再学会放弃
我不想忘记你
就算可以
我宁可记得所有伤心
我努力想起你苦也没关系
用祝福和感激勇敢失去你
爱你这个决定
虽然艰辛
我不说对不起

Yodellay, yodallay, yodallayheehoooo~

Here i am blogging on my pathetic blog..
Heheheheh. I'm Sorry for the lack of updates!
I'm busy working like a cow because finally I felt that "Money Is Important" in this worlddddd..
Why do i feel this way?
Hmm, let me think about it & i'll tell you :X
What-a-nonsense. ~.~

After work, met up with HFH for dinner while waiting for Mr S. Huahua to come..
I'm so tired after work although i finished work at 6pm today.. While on the way back home, Huahua kept making me laugh like zzmadness! Asshole shining b****! D:
Hahahaha~


D:





Although i may appear to be cheerful/lively, but deep down in my heart I am not.
I'm trying not to think about you!!!

P.S : There's nothing I could say to you. Nothing I could ever do to make you see anymore. You'd changed. You'll never be replaced. I'll be waiting...

▪ I miss the bright smile of yours..
▪ I miss the way you wink your eyes at me when i'm bored..
▪ I miss the way you hug me for no reasons..
▪ I miss the way you pat me to sleep whenever i can't get to sleep..
▪ I miss the way you kiss me on my forehead before i head to bed..
▪ I miss the way you piggyback me whenever i'm tired to walk..
▪ I just simply miss everything of you..




How long will I be waiting, to be with you again?
I'm gonna tell you that I love you, in the best way that I can..